Tribute to Oma

All of my grandparents have passed away. The last was my mom's mother. My mom's family is a close knit one of six sisters and one brother. On average, they have two children each give or take a couple (more on the give). I am glad for each and every one of my aunts and uncles and cousins. The only thing I keep hearing is how my aunts and uncles help each other and their families (ie my cousins). My mom's only brother was also the oldest sibling, and he waited to get married until every one of his sisters were married and cared for. He was tough and stern, but also one of the gentlest person I know.

I can't help but think that our family's closeness is from Oma's teachings. Her morals and values were her most valuable inheritance to her children, and consequently to us, her grandchildren. Both her and Opa lived with us after Opa's stroke. He needed full time care. Oma was by his side, every day without complain. Feeding him, cleaning him, taking him outside to enjoy the sun. And she still had the time to care and love my sister and I.

Back then, I didn't know that's what it was. I was annoyed at her for keeping the food from me until she deemed the food (especially the soup) was cool enough for me to eat. It was especially annoying when she kept tasting the food to check it.

When I was in grade school but old enough to come home on my own, I would often play soccer or hang out with my friends after school. Many times I would come home after dark. Oma would be walking up and down the street worrying for me. Back then, I didn't know that's her way of expressing her love for me. I was mad at her for waiting for me...maybe I was embarrassed.

Opa passed away after a while. Then we moved away, but we couldn't take Oma with us. So she stayed with her other children. As I grew older, and away from Oma, I wasn't lacking love and attention from my own family. Ok, so I have a stubborn and rebellious sister, a stubborn dad, a stubborn mom and I myself am stubborn and rebellious. Oh, yea we were all stubborn about different things at the same time OR the same things at different times.

I received several letters from Oma. All full of her wisdom and advice. Many were the usual things, study, get my degree (Opa was a teacher and they both believe in the value of education), respect my parents, and many others Her most progressive though, was about marriage. She simply told me to make sure that when I got married, it was to someone who I care for and who care for me.

When she passed away, I took stock of my family. My sister has her masters, I have my physics and engineering degrees, my cousins have their degrees (including engineers and doctors). We are close to each other as in if we need help, we will give each other help with no hesitation. Sure we don't talk or email often (well my sister does), but we have a strong bond...Oma. I think she would be proud of the legacy that she and Opa left, us.

Oma, I'm still looking for the one who you would approve of. I know you will pull me up by my ears if I don't ask her out when I meet her.